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Do You Really Want Your Ex Back?

If you can be, do and have anything you want, why the hell do you want your ex back? I’m not saying that people can’t change and maybe he does come around as the right guy for you.

In my experience, “Get Your Ex Back” courses are just clever marketing to help you get over a break up and move on to a better person. Embarrassingly, I will admit to buying a few of these courses. While some of them are surprisingly good, they all just affirm one thing: I definitely did not want it that particular ex back.

Making up to break up is usually a one way ticket to the hot mess express. While glamorized in our current culture, it is a recipe for years of issues you don’t want to deal with. If someone is at a stage in life when they legitimately can’t be with someone and both parties mutually agree to leave the door open to a relationship in the future, that’s fair and more of an exception. However, trying to force two people to be together that shouldn’t be is a recipe for sheer misery.

Think about it this way: would you trade in a beat up old car for a shiny new Tesla if you could? For argument’s sake, the Tesla is free with no strings attached. Most sane people would do this. An ex is usually a downgrade.

Most people don’t get back together with an ex because he’s done a huge transformation and suddenly shows up as Mr. Perfect. Instead, they get back together because she feels like she has no better options and chooses to endure years of more steaming piles of crap. Then, they become the couple that chills out in matching (and expanding) his and hers sweatpants not being able to stand the sight of each other but sticking it out for the kids. By the way, the kids in question are usually a hot mess because of this. Why do you think most millennials are a hot mess?

No one wants that but, they secretly settle for it because they feel that it’s all that they deserve. Then they are on their death bed wondering “what if” and only having themselves to blame.

If you get nothing else from this, remember that you’re a sexy, shiny new Tesla- not a beat up piece of crap that you’re embarrassed that you have to drive. So, relax in your beautifully crafted vegan leather seat and immerse yourself in that beautiful new car smell while the right person comes to you.

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