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No Longer the "Mormon Dating Coach"

· Faith

After months of internal struggle and deliberation, I have decided to leave the Church of Latter Day Saints. I have great respect for the church and all of the good that they do around the world. I also respect many other facets of the church.

However, the church is not right for me. There are multiple reasons but, here are the big ones:

1)Despite being upfront about not wanting children (and most likely not being able to have them anyway), it was heavily pushed on me by MULTIPLE people that I need to "compromise", "change my mind", "that I would have a hard time" and being felt that I should give up what I want because "God wants me to". Life doesn't work like that. I have very few dealbreakers but, that is the main one.

2) I was also being pressured to marry someone because they were LDS and had a pulse. I was fine dating and potentially marrying a nonmember. But, that would have been a huge issue had I stayed and we would not have enjoyed the same privileges as those married within their faith. If I had been determined to marry within the church, I would have discounted a lot of awesome guys out there.

3) I also have a major issue with the fact that my mom and virtually all of my friends and family would not be able witness the wedding between my future spouse and I. I was the only Mormon in my family and that would have been incredibly isolating.

4) I believe that the church is very unfair to the LGBT community. For a church that is "pro-family", the church does not allow LGBT members the same rights as everyone else. The definition of a family is changing and the church needs to get on board. I can't go to a church or tithe to a church that isn't inclusive to everyone- especially the LGBT community. While I will give them some credit for trying, they just aren't there.

If you were wondering, I am still saving myself for marriage. I made the choice to do so almost two years ago and regret not doing so sooner. I also still abstain from alcohol. I definitely still consider myself a non-denominational Christian and am looking for a progressive, open-minded church.

I may open up more about this when ready. But, this is a huge life change and I need some time to process everything. Again, I am not "anti-Mormon" nor is there any animosity towards the church on my end. They do a lot of good around the world and I still have friends within the church that are incredibly dear to me. I respect the rights that all people have to worship whom they chose- whether I agree with them or not.

I am thankful that the Church of Latter Day Saints brought an avowed Atheist back to Christianity and, while I disagree, am grateful for my time spent in the church. It was an amazing learning experience. The missionaries are also more than welcome to knock on my door if they want a Gatorade or something.

I will be filling out the necessary paperwork and starting the process to leave within the next few days. While I have helped clients of multiple backgrounds, I am no longer the Mormon Dating Coach. I have answered any questions that you probably have and am asking for privacy during this time.

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