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The Timing Will Never Be Right

· dating advice

The timing is never right- for anything. This is doubly true with love. Very few couples I know met when the timing was "right". Sometimes, they were in school. Other times, they were broke. Especially as a young woman, it's tempting to wait until the timing is "right". But, wanna know a secret? It never is.

In my situation, I'm half way through losing sixty pounds (I gained about twenty from lifestyle changes and forty from getting really sick and my metabolism stopping). I also just started a business a few months ago (coaching!), am about a year away from graduating, have a calling at church (basically a church leadership role), work a day job and a few side hustles. I also travel anytime I get the opportunity- it's when I'm the happiest and one of my biggest goals is to see as much of the world as I can. This goal is outline, broken down into smaller trips, and I'm slowly accomplishing it. Trust me: if anyone is busy and has no time, it's me. Regardless, I always thought everything had to be in order before I could even think of settling down. But, that's not the case.

It may sound cheesy but, love will find a way. I have friends who just got married right after they turned 21. Both are in school, broke, and (somehow) making it work. I have other friends who are in school, in their early twenties, and engaged to someone they're crazy about. They never had to beg their partner to commit or tell him what to do- he just did. But, people find love when the timing isn't right every day. Some marry their divorce lawyers or go on that set up they were skeptical about after a painful divorce. Others aren't quite where they want to be physically, in life, or in general. But, they work on themselves and still put themselves out there. Why? They want it bad enough and that's the only way they can do it.

I understand being busy though. It's near impossible for me to fill my free time during the week with singles events. Why? I'm probably sleeping during that free time. Most days, I might get an hour to myself during the week to eat, shower, quickly hang out with my fluffballs, and read a bit before bed. If it's a good day, an hour and a half. But, I always make sure I'm out doing something on Saturdays (my one day off)- whether it's a date, Meetup, adventure in a different part of the city, social event through church, or anything else. If I don't have any dates by Wednesday, I fill up my days with other plans (even if I would rather be curled up watching Netflix). If you want it, you do it.

I also work on myself in the meantime and will always continue to do so. Honestly, there's no excuse not to and all of us can improve somewhere. Work on yourself while you are on the search for Mr. Right and after you meet him. It's hard work. But, nothing worth having in life is ever easy.

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